Tuesday, August 7, 2007

Let the sun shine...


One may think wealth is the quickest way to find happiness; that pursuit of the ages as hinted in our Declaration of Independence. I do not think myself avaricious, but admit that if judged by appearance alone I could be lumped in this category. I have mistakenly chosen a quest to serve the almighty dollar. I often equate happiness with contentment and admit I very rarely possess this feeling. As far as synonyms I think joy a more worthy aim, but I find it as fickle and fleeting a thing.
Previous blogs would prove that I do not find myself in this euphoric state often. I believe moments of joy are the defense against the darkest of all human defeats. I do not have children but I suspect that the moment of childbirth, an act riddled with pain, after the pain has subsided, when a mother holds a child for the first time would be best described as joyous. I feel something similar but smaller in scale as the flowers in my garden bloom. Amazed at the grandeur of its design. This element of life and living is a fragile state. The very things needed to give us life: earth, air, and water; can also be instruments of destruction. These thoughts of wonder are tempered by memories of anger, loss, and injustice. And I will freely admit that these are the emotions I know all too well.
When hopes are dashed and ones time has been squandered, frustration is sure to follow, if an element of intellect has been applied to the equation. Innocence and naivete must surely be lost or cast aside. But how is self respect to remain. This internal conflict is a hereditary aspect of my youth. Hence my name, goodnevili, life has elements of good and evil, and in elements of art and light this battle is often portrayed in shades of black and white. When combined hues of gray emerge and the spectrum develops.

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